September 21, 2011

Freakin' Men

Anyone remember close to a year ago when I started this running shit? And then I signed up for my first 5K that wasn't so much a 5K as an Al Qaeda training course? Somehow I lived through it and what did I go and do? I signed up again! I signed me and my Beast up. The Beast who hadn't run 12 feet in the last 3 years, his words, not mine.

It's roughly 6 weeks before the race and he starts training. First day - 2.5 miles in way the fuck less time than it takes me. Second day - 2.5 miles in way way the fuck less time than it takes me AND he tells me that he ran up the unholy hill into our neighborhood.

Skinny Bitch and her husband are also running with us and she went through the same damn thing. When I voiced my disgust that he and Skinny Bitch's husband can just up and decide to run and immediately are so much faster than us and run up hills that are not meant to be run up, he replied I'm sorry that men are superior in every possible way. We haven't spoken since.

By the way, I think it's time for Skinny Bitch's husband gets a proper blog name. Skinny Bastard, perhaps?


Kritta22 said...

Seriously?!!!! Cut his shoe laces then see how fast he runs.

Unknown said...

SO unfair. AND if they decide they want to drop a few pounds it usually takes practically no effort on their part. AND they can pee standing up. But since we are so obviously mentally and emotionally superior I guess God felt he had to give them a few superior traits to make up for it.

Ordie O. said...

Matt comes up with some funny stuff.