May 18, 2011

I Will Take An Old Lady Down

I run along a bike/walking path, trail, whatever you want to call it. It's paved so maybe that renders it not a trail since I think of trails as dirt paths through the woods??? Whatever, that's not the point. People walk, run, ride bikes, walk dogs... I even saw a man roll a shopping cart along there once... I digress. Again. I'm trying to say that a lot of people use the path and I manage to peacefully share it with all of them. Save one. One wretched old lady. The damn path is 8 feet wide - plenty of room to pass me, the old lady obscenities aren't necessary. Clarification: 'old lady obscenities' is shit like 'move outta the stinkin' way there!' or 'oh for 'crimmeny sake, watch out!'. Seriously, she's wretched! And I've about had enough. You may look like Betty White but you've got all the charm of Hannibal Lecter and I've got a broom handle for your bicycle spokes next time, old lady!

4 comments:

Monster Mom said...

LMFAO!!! I can relate! I have an old fart that does just about the same thing, except we're not riding bicycles/jogging... we're in cars on a residential street. I do the speedlimit +5, and he gets behind me and lays on the horn because apparently I'm going to slow. Some mornings I let him pass though, because otherwise I might be tempted to slam on the brakes and let him find out what a 2010 pontiac bumper tastes like. I wonder why he don't just leave his house like 5 minutes earlier.

AshMo said...

Take a bitch down! lol
Trip her...

Brandy Rose said...

I'd be purposefully getting in her way.

Lorie Shewbridge said...

Seriously, I agree with Brandy Rose... take her down. What's with the mouth on her? I think she needs a real smack down, and YOU are just the gal to do it!