From the list of prompts, today I chose Are all the stories on your blog true?
Wellllll, um yeah. Kinda. Last week I poured my heart out in this post. For real, ya'll, that first nickname was wretched, I still hate it. This week my mom is here visiting and she called me out. It seems there was no bean shaped birth mark. My father called me Beaner because I ate beans. Oh well, in that case the years of teasing were totally worth it then. *eyeroll* That's not any better an explanation but the eyeroll is more because I swear on my laptop, she is the one who told me that. I mean, seriously, where the hell would I come up with that? Oh, she and my disloyal ass husband had a good laugh at my expense. Then they ate the dinner that I cooked. Who's laughing now, bitches? Oh hell, alright, I didn't cook it all by myself but 2 out of the 3 dishes I did. I'm already sick of this honestly bullshit.
The Mr likes to claim that I completely twist everything to fit whether it is what happened or not. Something about it's like living with a freak tape recorder that twists his words or some such nonsense. Okay, yeah, there are times I give you wittier lines than you actually came up with. Won't happen again, honey. In fact when I was racking my brain for new blog names, he came up with two really good ones. Wicked Embellishments and Literary Indiscretions. Pretty good except the embellishment shit. I resemble that remark!
Overall, yes, the stories on my blog are true. They happened. To me. And I'll tell the story any damn way I want to. Can't fault a girl for being creative, can you? Not when it's that girl's blog. Neener, neener, neener!