October 25, 2010

30 Days, Day 25

My day in great detail.

On a good day or bad day depending on how tired I am I'm up at 6am for a run. I come home to two pissed off little boys because I had the audacity to leave the confines of my prison our house without them.

The Mr leaves for work and I brawl with Aidan over clothes to wear to school. You cannot wear nylon basketball shorts and a grey t-shirt every mother fucking day, Aidan!

I feed the snots if they haven't already bullied Daddy into it and sometimes even though he already fed them. Then I turn them loose on the cul de sac to ride their bikes and scooters before school.

8:30am we leave to take Aidan to school, home by 9am and then my shift as Asher's Bitch starts. He orders me to get him something to drink, something to eat, turn on Franklin, get him a blanket, turn on or off the fan, get Polar Bear or Dashmating (translation Dalmation) for him, pucker up and kiss his ass... Oh wait, that's just what I feel is next.

Then Mr comes home for lunch and Asher forgets I exist until he leaves again. Nap time follows on the days God knows I might break the sixth commandment. Yes, I had to look up which one Thou Shalt Not Kill was, blow me. 4:15pm Aidan bebops in from the bus and my shift as Aidan's Bitch starts. Note: This overlaps with my shift as Asher's Bitch, no cigarette breaks, folks.

Pretty much from this moment until 8pm is a blur of dinner, spelling words, reading for Book It, dishes sometimes, baths sometimes, picking up toys, tooth brushing, 1600 kisses and hugs good night and finally collapsing on the couch.

We bond over TV or a movie or sex before we go to bed. I read by lamplight, which he swears I do simply to irritate him, and eventually fall asleep. Ah blessed sleep!

Pepper in throughout the day yelling, fighting, screaming, super important internet time, glances in the mirror that make me cringe, swinging, a walk every once in a blue moon, and any and every crazy little thing that could possibly go right or wrong. That's my day. In great detail.

Tomorrow, my week in great detail. I'll give you a hint, it's just like today's times 7.


Texan Zombie Goddess said...

Do we live together??

Anonymous said...

WOW! You are busy! And I'm not - for once - being sarcastic! I'd forgotten how much work being a wife, Mom, a little mix of human being, IS!!!
And all I can think of right now is that country song, "You're Gonna' Miss This.." And with my baby, at 17 yrs. old, set to graduate next year.. It's that other country song, "Don't Blink.."
Oh good God, what the hell is the matter with me this morning?!
Great post, great family, great life, rah, rah! ;)

Teisha said...

Thank you for spelling out what the sixth commandment was so I didn't have to google it.