August 17, 2010

Did I Or Did I Not Have A Boy?

It seems my 6 year old son has morphed into a fucking preteen girl. These quirks are getting monotonous. 

The scene: School clothes shopping
A little background you need to know - last school year there were knock down drag out early morning cage matches between me and Aidan over his clothes. Most often it was me being absolutely ludicrous by refusing to let him wear #1 the same thing he wore the day before, #2 a shirt that says High School Chicks Rule, #3 pants with a hole in the crotch or a shirt with BBQ sauce stains or #4 underwear - God forbid!
I decided this year he will be picking out his clothes and he'll be wearing the damn things with no lip about it. Uh, yeah, things didn't exactly work out. He refuses to wear shorts with buttons, zippers, belts or belt loops. Forget that the belt can be taken off, let's not interject logic and reason into this, mkay?  Also, every shirt he picked out was a grey t-shirt. No collars, no buttons, nothing that could be construed as dressing as though you might give a shit about looking decent. Socks, how hard could socks be? Oh, let me just tell you how hard socks can be. They must be grey at the toes and heel. They must be ankle socks, nothing higher or lower. Shoes, I can't even talk about the outrageous cluster-fuck ordeal that was shoe shopping with him.

I give up, the little punk can wear a grey t-shirt with ratty basketball shorts, no underwear, the same old pair of tennis shoes every damn day of his life if he choses. I'll pack his lunch and drop him off at school and be done with it. He can take it up with his therapist in 20 years.

11 comments:

Unknown Mami said...

He'll be fine in all his grey glory.

Diosa Del Desierto Corazon said...

Shit. At first I thought I he was picking out dresses and nylons lol. My youngest girls put on clothes that are specifically "play" clothes. No one can find their shoes and if they do, they suddenly don't fit. Did you change your undies this morning? No, do I have to?? Holy crap on a stick Batman....

Times like this I wish they wore uniforms or I still homeschooled....

I feel ya girlfriend.

\IiiI

Stacie's Madness said...

wow. were our kids split at birth?
I just said to a friend the other day that my son (also 6) throws more whiny fits than a pmsy teen girl.

PS love the new header.

Anonymous said...

This is one reason I'm so glad my son's public school does uniforms. It's a no brainer in the mornings. His toughest choice is red or navy polo shirt and khaki or navy shorts.

Matilda Coven said...

My sixteen year old and the LAST of mine left in school picked out Hawaiian Shirts, golf shorts (you know those stupid plaid ugly things) and faded black jeans. Apparently this was his girlfriends idea. (Last year it was pajama pants and t-shirts. Every day.) I just paid for it. I gave up choosing what they wear a long time ago. As long as the school doesn't complain, so be it!

Kirby said...

Hey let him wear that High School Chicks Rule shirt he'll make the other girls jealous and be 'the man"! Haha! Thats hilarious! My kids are picky little shits to and I give up!

Ordie O. said...

Atta girl! Pick your battles!

Opto-Mom said...

Ummmm, he sounds exactly like my husband. Is the kid tall, bald, and does he have a fascination with football and 80's rock music? If so, my husband is your baby daddy! What the hell? LOL

Love your blog...come check out mine too, and stay away from my husband! (hee hee, hope you know I'm totally kidding...you can have my hubby if you want him...I have listed him on craigslist.)

ummmhello said...

I love schools with uniforms - Muahahaa!

Sandra said...

With kids nowadays (I have four, I can say this) you know there's going to be a therapist involved at some point. Might as well just accept it so we don't have to live up to a ridiculously high bar. Long live the grey tshirt and the ratty shorts!

Lorie and Bill Shewbridge said...

I can't wait to see the picture from his first day of school!
I'm sure he will still be adorable.
Be glad, wait until he is a teenager and he starts to like girls... then the clothes will be REALLY expensive, I remember!!