August 5, 2010

Celebrity Thursday Thirteen

I've been working this one up in my head for awhile now. It's easy, actually, because celebrities piss me off fairly often. And I don't ever feel bad for ripping on them because, well, they're rich and beautiful so I figure they got it coming. 

There are so many to chose from for this list - Lindsay Lohan, but then I've kinda already let her have it. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, but I've voiced my opinion on them before. Heidi Spencer or Pratt or whateverthehellhernameis, but you can only make fun of crazy to a point and then it's just sad. Julia Roberts, but I don't want to feel the wrath of the But she's America's Sweetheart! Pretty Woman! How can you not like her?!?!? Brigade. I'd like to slap Charlie Sheen but he'd probably like it. Mel Gibson lost his shit again but he scares me so I'll leave that alone right now. 

Today, all 13 slots are taken up by the one and only Gisele Bundchen. This bitch takes up with that dumb jock Tom Whatever either before or way too fucking soon after the prick dumps his pregnant girlfriend. Then she totes the boy around any papparazzi she can scare up. Then she gets knocked up and talks about how it's not necessary to gain weight while pregnant. Oh shut the fuck up! Then she births her own ticket to the tabloid pages and spouts off about how painless birth was. Oh shut the mother fuck up! Then this bitch keeps running her damn head and waxes poetic about how it should be worldwide law that women breastfeed for 6 months. Please, Miss Perfect, stick to showing your ass on the runway and shut the FUCK up already! 
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