My Coolness Cup Runneth Over

We've all got that friend.  The one you'd probably hate if you didn't adore her?  You know, she's entirely too beautiful or hysterically funny or she can decorate a room within an inch of it's life or most annoying, all of the above.  Mine is Tiffany.  Tiffany lives a wildly fantastic life where she doesn't wipe asses and nuke corn dogs all day.  She talks to adults regularly so while she may not know all the words to Jungle Room by The Imagination Movers, she's way more versed in actual cool shit that I know nothing of.  See why it would be so easy to just hate her?

Anyway, I said all that to tell this story.  Last night we talked on the phone for the first time in months and as usual I'm stuttering and babbling because it's hard to make my answers to "what have you been up to" like Well, Aidan can spell shit now and Asher still craps his pants sound remotely interesting.  In the middle of a that fascinating monologue a bug flies into my mouth and I come close to choking to death.  Surely she hung up thinking My God, Amanda is so fucking cool!