February 19, 2010

A Short List Of Shit I'm Sick Of

Aidan's patience level and smart mouth. Here's a little example - After all of about 3 1/2 seconds of trying to get into a box he's not even supposed to be getting into, we hear this...

I can't get this damn thing open!

What did you just say?

I SAID I can't get this DAMN thing open!

The Olympics. I know, I know... Shaun White, Lindsey Vonn, Shani Davis... I'm sorry! I like the opening ceremonies and the highlights of Team America winning shit but I'm over it. I want my shows back, reruns piss me off.

The Drop Off Line Nazis at Aidan's school. I'm driving the truck which is a crew cab with suicide doors. Aidan sits in the back, usually behind me. This presents a problem since the drop off line is like the pit at Nascar. Apparently the time it takes for me to jump out and let him out is too long and I get scolded. I moved him behind the passenger side but he can't open the door and then the suicide door by himself and the Nazi's don't help at all so I still get scolded for him taking too long. Now I have him climb up into the front seat when we get into the turn around so he can just jump out. Instead of getting scolded for holding up the line, now I get "the look" from the Nazis because he's in the front seat. It's all I can do not to scream BLOW ME, NAZI! as I drive away.

Our guest bed. I end up sleeping there with one kid or another every night. I don't know how I used to sleep on that mattress, it is absolutely miserable! So hard! I pile the blankets and mattress pads on when company comes but that's a lot of bedding to wash after accidents. If I wasn't so cheap I'd go out and buy a better mattress. Unfortunately for my guests, I am cheap. Bring an air mattress or feather bed when you come. I'll make up for the sucky accommodations with my fabulous french toast in the morning.

Snow. I take back all those times I said I wanted to live somewhere cold and snowy. I was an idiot. Point proven, okay, Universe? I get it!

Told you it was a short list.

6 comments:

zookeeperjess said...

My sons new thing to say is dammit lol.

snow sucks.

and i'm over the olympics too.

screw the drop off nazis! can't win for losing!

Mama Gayle said...

The other day when my EX was putting my son's shoes on, the 2 year old looked at him and said "wrong f*cking foot."

Nocturnal Queen said...

At my daughter's elementary school, the kids are not allowed to let themselves out of their vehicles. There are teachers and sometimes older students who open the doors for them for safety reasons. I'm surprised they don't do that for the kids at your son's school. Seems like that would solve things.

My son is in middle school and lets himself out. There are no helpers there, understandably.

adrienzgirl said...

We have a NAZI at my drop off zone. SHE IS OLD AND MEAN! And she thinks we are all stupid. Damn lady, we do this every. single. day. No, I didn't forget, since this MORNING where to go. Sheesh!

Ordie O. said...

So which of us (guests) have been having the accidents? I'll bring my plastic suit to wear to bed, thanks.

Lorie Shewbridge said...

You and Aidan totally crack me up! I'm sorry to laugh at your pain and misery, but you just make it so easy. I agree with just screwing with the Drop Off Nazi's, he's your kid, take care of him and let the other people WAIT!!
Have a nice day... :-)