February 26, 2010

Obsessions Come Easily To Me

Since I'm ever so patiently waiting to watch the last season of Lost I've moved on to a new show. We recently got Showtime and oh sweet Baby Jesus have I got myself all wrapped up in The Tudors. Who else is watching this and why did I not know about it until now? Who knew the 1500's could be so sexy?

February 26

Hey. You know what today is? Today is the suckiest day ever. Today marks 4 years since my boys' sister, our daughter, Anna Reese came into and out of our lives. February 26. I hate this day. So I will spend today ignoring the fact that it is the day that it is. I've got mad coping skills like that.

February 25, 2010

What Happens When You Get 25 Women In A Room?

The Women Tell All. Lies. That's what they tell, mkay, ya'll?

I'm just going to skip over most of the hour and a half of bullshit fluff they blew up our asses on Monday night. But I do have some opinions.

Michelle AKA Crazy Girl. I didn't start watching The Bachelor until the hometown dates so I missed most of what they were talking about but based on what I saw and the clips I've come to a conclusion. Michelle was/is crazy. As are the rest of you heifers! Ever heard the old saying about people in glass whorehouses? Yeah, take heart, every single one of you signed up to compete to hook up with a guy on TV. In my opinion, makes you all crazy.

Elizabeth from Nebraska AKA Forehead Girl. "You can only kiss my forehead. Do you want to make out with my forehead?". Girl, there is an art to being a tease. You don't have a knack for it. Also, I'm pretty sure you have to put out completely to make it to the end and even then you can get booted *cough* Gia *cough*. Just sayin'.

Bachelor Cast Reunions AKA Didn't hook up enough during my season so here I am. Let's Party!

Bachelor Cast Does Charity AKA Make up for shit that happened during Bachelor Cast Reunions.

Rozlyn. Oh, Rozlyn. What can I say, really? Girl hooks up with Forbidden Producer, Forbidden Producer gets the ax, Girl gets booted, Host accuses Girl on national TV, Girl denies, Jealous Catty Bitches make shit up about Girl, Girl denies, Host continues to accuse Girl, Girl loses her shit and accuses Host of trying to screw Forbidden Producer's wife, end of show. That's just good trash TV, folks.

February 24, 2010

C to the Razy

I have totally avoided this whole OctoMom thing up until today. Now it's ON. And you guys think Kate Gosselin is crazy. You do not know crazy!

So today Nadya Suleman was on The View this morning and oh. my. God. ya'll, this woman is completely whacked out. Completely. It's like the shit they pumped into her lips leaked out into her brain and now she can't quit stomping her feet and cackling and bouncing around. Whatever that shit was, it contains crack. Pure cocaine. And quite possibly some meth. I've tried to find the video of her appearance on The View and all I can find is this. It only scrapes the surface of the crazy.

The segment in it's entirety is probably in the hands of the DEA now. They're going through the footage frame by frame trying to isolate just exactly what the holy fuck that woman took so they can put out a warning to the public. I know there will soon be clips of Whoopi's face during the interview. All of the hosts were pretty uncomfortable. Hell, I was so uncomfortable I started writing this while it was all still going down. Let me just say I love a good train wreck. It takes a lot to make me uncomfortable. I don't know how else I can say the woman is crazy. And on something. And is crazy.

Getting to Know You

Just a few of my quirks. Some of them might shed some light on my personality disorder.

I hate gold. Well, yellow gold really. I hate gold fixtures. I will not buy a vehicle with gold accents. Hate it. I don't know why, it's not rational.

Three sitcoms that make me gut laugh with every episode; King of Queens, Big Bang Theory, and The New Adventures of Old Christine. I wanna be Old Christine when I grow up.

I'm scared of Oprah. That woman is SO powerful and SO influential and SO rich. Just like China, I'm pretty sure she could take over the world if she just up and decided to. When the Olympics were in China, I almost pulled my hair out.

If I try to read a blog in a reader and only the first 5 lines show and then I have to click the link to read the rest, I delete the blog from my reader. And I'll only bookmark it to read again if it's really really good. It's bitchy, I know. I'm a bitch. Them's the breaks.

It would be really great if Asher could potty train himself. Aidan did it. Would it be wrong of me to start with the "Why can't you be more like your bother" spiel?

I can't wait for Lost to be over. I'm DVRing them all so I can watch all at once because I'm entirely too impatient to wait a week in between episodes. It's KILLING me not to watch!

February 21, 2010

He Started It!

I had my first Wii Fit Plus work out Tuesday.

During start up, where it measures balance and posture went ok. During this part, the balance board is a character. Kind of a wise ass character as you'll soon realize. My Balance Board neglected to make any remarks at that point. However, when the info from all that calculating popped up the Balance Board ran his head a little with "Whoa! That's Super Grossly Disgustingly Way Too Big! Let's get on a program. Pick a trainer." I presented my favorite finger in response but by the time I flew it high, Balance Board as a character was gone. I like to think he saw it though.

I chose Male Trainer who I will affectionately call Trainer El Diablo or TED for short. After one balance activity the son of a bitch asked me if I have trouble walking around. I said No, but your mom does, bitch!

I took Friday off and when I started on Saturday morning the bastard said Too busy to work out yesterday, Amanda? I said, Yeah. Too busy with your mom!

I can see this Your Mom thing going on long term and getting real ugly.

February 19, 2010

I Can't Believe I'm Making Wagers On This Crap

Stacie from Stacies Madness, Krista from Protect and Provide, and myself have a bit of a bet going. They The loser(s) sends me the winner(s) a bag of their favorite candy. We're betting on the winner of The Bachelor. I say Vienna already has Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is by the balls and she'll win. Stacie and Krista think Tenley dances away with the ring. "Dances away", you know, because she dances, get it? I crack myself up! We'll find out in a couple weeks!

Who do you think "wins"?

A Short List Of Shit I'm Sick Of

Aidan's patience level and smart mouth. Here's a little example - After all of about 3 1/2 seconds of trying to get into a box he's not even supposed to be getting into, we hear this...

I can't get this damn thing open!

What did you just say?

I SAID I can't get this DAMN thing open!

The Olympics. I know, I know... Shaun White, Lindsey Vonn, Shani Davis... I'm sorry! I like the opening ceremonies and the highlights of Team America winning shit but I'm over it. I want my shows back, reruns piss me off.

The Drop Off Line Nazis at Aidan's school. I'm driving the truck which is a crew cab with suicide doors. Aidan sits in the back, usually behind me. This presents a problem since the drop off line is like the pit at Nascar. Apparently the time it takes for me to jump out and let him out is too long and I get scolded. I moved him behind the passenger side but he can't open the door and then the suicide door by himself and the Nazi's don't help at all so I still get scolded for him taking too long. Now I have him climb up into the front seat when we get into the turn around so he can just jump out. Instead of getting scolded for holding up the line, now I get "the look" from the Nazis because he's in the front seat. It's all I can do not to scream BLOW ME, NAZI! as I drive away.

Our guest bed. I end up sleeping there with one kid or another every night. I don't know how I used to sleep on that mattress, it is absolutely miserable! So hard! I pile the blankets and mattress pads on when company comes but that's a lot of bedding to wash after accidents. If I wasn't so cheap I'd go out and buy a better mattress. Unfortunately for my guests, I am cheap. Bring an air mattress or feather bed when you come. I'll make up for the sucky accommodations with my fabulous french toast in the morning.

Snow. I take back all those times I said I wanted to live somewhere cold and snowy. I was an idiot. Point proven, okay, Universe? I get it!

Told you it was a short list.

February 17, 2010

A Level Of Gross To Which No-one Should Aspire

I was getting ready after a shower and Aidan says "Hmmm, I like this salt stuff." What the hell is he talking about 'salt', I have no salt in the bathroom. I turn around to see him holding my opened Ped-Egg. Um, gross!

If it helps any, I think he was just feeling it and not tasting it. I think.

February 16, 2010

Thankful For The Bachelor Because I'm Low On Blog Material

Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever your name is, a few things about tonight's episode;

In regard to your street dancing with Gia and the locals, please don't dance again until you've had some instruction by a professional. Pretty please?

In regard to your "When she said that to me, it just made my heart glow" remark. Dude! You can't say shit like that. I'm pretty sure they can take your penis away over that shit. For real. Even the Mr said so.

In regard to saying "I'm falling in love with her" about ALL of them. You do realize all these women, including the woman you're going to marry - delusional much? - will eventually see all of this, don't you? Maybe you've never dated a woman before but let me assure you, you WILL regret this.

In regard to not taking CryBaby Ali back. It's possible you gained a testicle in my opinion for that. Now if you just hadn't irritated me so badly with the above mentioned incidents, you might still have it. Sorry.

We need to recap for a sec, okay? You called Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is and beg to come back hoping he'll say come back and he loves you - and of course he'll say it, right, I mean he says it to EVERY ONE OF YOU. Only he doesn't. And you keep trying and he's not responding so you pull out the big guns, the line that you've been practicing for days, "I hope you can keep going back to that night... and know how much I cared." Do you need a minute to let what you just said sink in? You dumbass! Yes, he's going back to that night. The one where you left to go back to some job that, let's be honest, wouldn't be too hard to replace. Gawd, I am so glad you are not one of my picks for my bet with Krista. Go ahead and get that bag of Bit O' Honeys in the mail, sweetie!

You got sent home. After you "opened yourself up to him". We're all grownups here, you can go ahead and say that you put out. So you put out and he booted you anyway. Don't feel too bad, he let the other 2 "open up to him", too, and only one can win. I just hope the sheets in the Fantasy Suite were changed everyday.

Darlin', in the course of your date with Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is, he at one point or another, wore an eyepatch, a bandana, held a sword, and asked you to walk the plank with him. You are the youngest age-wise but you're dating a child. Good luck with that. Also, you were the 3rd girl to spend the night in the Fantasy Suite with Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is. I was just wondering if you found any panties strategically placed where he would have missed them but a woman would find them. Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, all women do it.

I know you have a big girl voice in there somewhere. Can you dig real deep and start using it for me? And one more thing, you love-timid divorcee, how'd it feel to finally open up put out since your divorce? I bet it was super special because you were #2 in the line of 3 women he spent the night in that cheesy ass Fantasy Suite that week. GROSS!

February 15, 2010

More Musical Monday

Just some of my faves...

The Calculation by Regina Spektor

A River Flows In your by Yiruma

You Found Me by The Fray

A Walk on the Wild Side by Lou Reed

Short Trip Home by Meyer

Bohemian Like You by Dandy Warhol

February 14, 2010

The Old Days

Since moving North last year I've had the same conversation about 16,000 times.

Where are you from?

Well, I was actually born in Nebraska but I grew up in Arkansas.

How'd you end up in Arkansas??? they all ask, flabbergasted at the thought

Well, my parents were hippies...

And I mean that in every sense of the term. Although now they'd be called "Green". They built our first house, made their own clothes, grew their own food, smoked pot no matter what they say now ... They were Flower People without a commune. 

February 13, 2010

A Couple of Aidan Moments

Earlier this week Aidan and Daddy were wrestling. Things were getting pretty rough and it was only a matter of time really until someone was crying. Or cussing. You decide who does which when they get hurt. Daddy shoved Aidan down, apparently by pushing him in the chest area. Aidan gets instantly furious and is holding his chest and screaming Ouch! My heart! You broke my heart! How am I supposed to say the Pledge of Allegiance now?!?!

On Thursday when I picked Aidan up from school he was chattering on about his day like he always does and I'm about half paying attention - not because I'm an asshole but because his little brother is which means I'm usually grabbing him up before he gets creamed by a car - when I catch "punched me in the face".

Wait. What? Who punched you in the face?


Ricky punched you in the face? When? Where? Why?

On the playground at recess. He punched me in the face. But it's okay cuz I punched him back.

You punched Ricky?


So you got into a fight?

Well, I didn't punch him in the face, I punched him somewhere else.

But you were fighting?



It's fun.

Oh. Kay...

I never got a call or note from school about it and he said a teacher saw them and told his classroom teacher. I guess they're going with the whole Boys Will Be Boys theory.

February 12, 2010

Blog Fart, Fragmented, Fuck It Friday

I want the Wii Fit Plus. I want it and I'm gonna get it. I've heard that it mocks you, makes fun of you, tells you to lay off the cupcakes if you weigh more than the last time. It almost came to blows when the damn Wii Sports told me I was 56 years old. I see a series detailing fights I get into with my Wii in this blog's future.

Aidan's independent streak lasted 3 days. I'm back to being his personal school- transportation-and-anything-else-his-heart-desires bitch again.

After I mentioned something about how he should be butt-crazy in love with me because I gave birth to his children, my husband informed me that my vagina is "Entry Only" from now on. Good to know he's designing vaginal street signs now days. 

It has come to my attention that I quit watching the last episode of The Bachelor too early because Ali Bad Fake Cryer calls Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is and wants to come back after she tearfully said goodbye to go back home to her job. BARF!!! It's obvious to me that my Bachelor recaps and opinion posts are not over. Also, when I first started writing "Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is" I honest to God thought his name was Jack. I only recently learned his name is Jake. That's how easy it is to tune everything about that man out - I didn't even pay attention to his name.

My hair is getting long and I'm itching to cut it. However, I'm in a new town with no one I trust with my hair yet. Let's just forget about that evil discount store salon incident, shall we? That's not happening again, that was a fluke. So I dried my hair naturally, no flat iron or straightening brush, just to see where things are, if I can stand to grow it out some more. We are in a bad, bad place, my friends. My hair is like 5/8ths curly. Not a good ratio. And straight, it's all stringy, like the hair of the dead girl who crawls out of that well in The Ring. It's settled, I need a haircut!

February 10, 2010

Late On The Band Wagon And Already I Want To Jump Off

Oh my God, The Bachelor. Is this for real? I almost can't write this because I don't know how to write in eye rolls and gags and sounds of pure disgust and mortification at even having a vagina while watching this circus.

Dear Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever your name is,

It's clear to us all that the women are beautiful. And they "look amazing". We get it. You say it all. the. time. About all of them. Along with "I've missed you" or "I missed this" and "There's something between us" and "She's special". Please just shut up. Stop talking. Stop making those concerned faces, you look constipated and, no pun intended but, full of shit. You're not coming out of this thing with a wife. You're just not. And at this point you should consider yourself lucky because of the 4 you went on hometown dates with you will end up the other half of a pretty package, a doormat, a puppet, or a rebound husband. Run away. Now.

Dear Gia,

Sweetheart, did you really think you needed to educate Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is on who that tall, green lady in the harbor was? And in the event that you really thought he didn't know, you should be embarrassed to whore yourself out to such a damn idiot on national television. But that's just me. Now that I got that off my chest, I think I like you the best. Or at least you irritated me the least. Either way, you win.

Dear Vienna,

Honey, I know everyone hates you. That's probably why I like you. Beyond that, I think you are what Kate Gosslin started out as. You are too much for Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is. Have you already picked out the jar where you will keep his balls? Is it decorative or just your ordinary, average canning jar? Just wonderin'. Carry on.

Dear Ali,

Ali, Ali, Ali... Who do you think you're fooling, honey? First of all, you really need to work on your fake crying. That was TERRIBLE! You cannot work a man properly with a performance like that. "Oh no, I'm being forced to go home or lose my job and I think I have to since I'm not sure about us..." is code for "I can't wait for the rose ceremony, please tell me I'm the one, Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever your name is." It's akin to the old fake pregnancy scare; in the end it will get you nowhere. So buh-bye.

Dear Tenely,

Oh dear God, love, will you please shut the hell up about your ex? He sucked, we get it. Your heart was broken, we get it. You were depressed for a year, we get it. He didn't appreciate your dancing, we get it. We have some news for you - Luke or Duke or Jack or whatever his name is doesn't appreciate it either. He just likes screwing you. Also, if there weren't 12 cameras on him when you started your interpretive dance to Canon in D, he would have run like hell. Like hell I tell you! And laughed. Snickered even. I saw it in his eyes. It was uncomfortable for all of us.

ALWAYS and NEVER because you WILL

Here's a thought; Even if you have no plans to leave the comfort and safety of your vehicle during your excursion to take a kid to school, ALWAYS wear a bra and NEVER wear slippers because the universe will not pass up an opportunity to screw with you and you WILL find yourself shuffling into a gas station, arms folded over your braless boobs to get your $7 back.

You want to know the story behind this, don't you, you sick bastards? That's good because I'm dying to tell it.

Why not, really? Why not wear slippers and no bra? I'm just swinging through the drop off lane and going straight home. No one will ever know! So I took the chance. On the way home I decided the Mr's truck was filthy so I was gonna quickly run though a car wash and rack up some Best Wife Ever points.

Car Wash #1 - After I pulled in the wrong way and had to pull up and back up 16 times to get in position to reach the keypad, Temporarily Closed. Awesome.

 Car Wash #2 - Tweaks out, takes my money, keeps asking for more. The impatient jackass behind me was making faces so I wave for him to back up so I can back up and tell him it's not working. He backs up, I back up, he pulls up and into the bay of car wash that I JUST PAID FOR and gets his damn car washed.

I'm like No you fucking did not! So I pull around to the exit to wait for the asshole to give me my damn money because surely he doesn't think he's just gonna pull that kind of bullshit with me RIGHT THERE!?!?

Clearly he did because he avoided eye contact and scurried by me like the little cockroach he is. ASSHOLE!

And that's when I realized my braless, slipper wearing ass was going to have to go inside the gas station. So I did. And they told me to go around and go into another part of the store to talk to someone else because OF COURSE just going into one public place wasn't enough for the universe. 

So I went into the second place and told my tale of woe while trying to pretend I wasn't wearing slippers and no bra. I don't think I fooled anyone but they gave me new code and out I shuffled, braless boobs in hand.

February 9, 2010

Resolution Updates

I think I've discovered the secret to keeping that New Years resolution about laundry. Just don't do the laundry. It's working like a charm for me!

Also, I've stopped badgering my husband about getting a new SUV. Only because I'm driving his truck and he's driving the bomb shelter on wheels. It's just a matter of time before we're at the car lot. Genius, I know.

So far, so good.

February 8, 2010

Musical Monday

I've never participated in Musical Monday but I love the series. I've found some awesome music I might have never heard were it not for MM. More specifically, Diane and Sara's MMs.

There is a song or complete album of music that defines every major period and event as well as random incidents in my life. Every person I know is characterized by a song in my head. Sometimes that's a bad thing because there are songs I absolutely love but can't listen to anymore. James Blunt's Goodbye My Lover is one of them. It's all Anna for me. I'm okay up until the "I'm so hollow..." part at the end.

Smashing Pumpkins 1979 makes me think of CCE trips in high school. I swear I get high just listening to that song.

I firmly believe Rascal Flatts' I'm Movin' On was written for me about my hometown. I left there in 1999 with a broken heart and a bitter taste in my mouth for the place. Every time I go back, as if on cue, this song either comes on the radio or pops into my head. I mean really, "I never dreamed home would end up where I don't belong."? That pretty much sums it all up for me.

Joshua Radin's Vegetable Car just makes me happy. It's so fun and always puts me in a good mood.

I fixate on music. I become right next to obsessed with a song. I'll search out the lyrics and listen over and over until the words are etched in my heart. Thank the geeks for the internet because that process used to be infinately more difficult. I remember waiting hours for a song to come on the radio so that I could record it on a cassette tape. God help the DJ if he talked over the beginning or end of the song. I called multiple radio stations and became irate about it. I was like 10. I was a weird kid.

Anyway, this song, Possibility by Lykke Li, is my current drug of choice and the song that made me start this novel of a post. It's beautiful and it's sad and it's haunting, it's a perfect heartbroken song. Hell, it almost makes my heart ache just to hear it. I've since found out it is on the soundtrack to New Moon which means it will become wildly popular (or it already is, I wouldn't know because I don't listen to radio) and that'll eventually kill it for me. But for now it's on repeat on my computer.

There's a possibility
There's a possibility
All that I had was all I'm gon' get


There's a possibility
There's a possibility
All I gon' get is gone with your stare
All I gon' get is gone with your stare
So tell me when you hear my stop
You're the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There's a possibility I wouldn't know


Know that when you leave
Know that when you leave
By blood by me you walk like a thief
By blood by me I fall when you leave
So tell me when you hear my heart stop
You're the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There's a possibility I wouldn't know
So tell me when my sigh is over
You're the reason why I'm closed
Tell me when you hear me falling
There's a possibility it wouldn't show


By blood and by me, I fall when you leave
By blood and by me, I follow your lead


February 6, 2010

This Is How Brothers Settle Disputes

"Gimme that ball!"

"No way!"

"I said gimme that ball. right. now. Asher!"

"No. way!"

*growl* *grunt* *slap* *crying* *grunt* *heavy breathing* *growl*

"Mom, Asher hit me!"


"Mom, he did it ag..."

*slap* *grunt* *the distinct sound of a punch in the gut* *crying*

"Hahahahaha, got it, Ada!"

February 5, 2010

Facebook High

I kinda see Facebook as MySpace for people who are over their high school bullshit. I didn't have a bad time in high school. I never carried around any emotional turmoil from those years, I just got lucky I guess. Our class was small, less than 150 I think. Basically, all of us who are on Facebook are mutual "friends". Granted, the only interaction I have had with some of them is to accept the friend add. Why did I accept friend adds from people I never spoke to in school? Because I wasn't hung up on the fact that we never spoke. Because I honestly don't care.

Now despite raving about not carrying grudges from high school, it seems I've developed one. A girl from high school who popped up on Facebook recently. I actually forgot all about her but one look at her face and wow, I've got a damn grudge! There is no word to describe her except bitch. Absolute bitch. She was popular I think. She was definately a mean girl. Not the Rachel McAdam's character on the Mean Girls movie but she was really mean. She was the kind of mean that actually scared you. If she was nice to you, you were terrified because that meant one of two things; either she was fighting with her crowd and coming to you so she didn't have to walk down the hall alone or *and this was more likely the case* she was simply being nice so it would sting just a little more when she did or said whatever nasty thing she was planning on saying or doing. That's who she was. I could see it in her eyes back then. And I think I can see it in her eyes now. I look at her profile photo and I honestly believe she is the same girl only she's the office bully now and she's raising little girls just like her. I don't know why I can't let it go. I don't think she ever got one over on me but I saw her do it plenty of times and the mere presence of her profile on the internet makes my blood boil. Plus she's got one of those names like Buffy or Babs. I've never met one I like and I blame this particular girl for that.

I seriously only wrote this out to get it off my chest because it irritates me immensely that I spend even a minute thinking about her. That and I want you all to take my side and say she's a bitch, too.

February 4, 2010

Overheard At My House

Here's a short list of things that even though I always knew I would have children, and more specifically that I'd have boys, I honest to God never thought I'd say, much less repeat several times a day.

"Get your hands out of your butt!"

"Why would you lick that?"

"Do not TRY to fart!"

"Quit slapping your penis!"

"Bath water is not for drinking."

"I don't want to smell your underwear."

"Where are your pants?"

"That will make you sick." *random mouthing* "Yes, it will!" *random mouthing* "Fine, eat it, don't come crying to me when you're sick."

February 2, 2010

Dear Brangelina

Dear Brangelina,

Yes, it's me. Writing an open letter to you. You, who it's possible I perhaps have, in the past, used the words homewrecker, slutbag, and tool to describe. You see, I think Jennifer Aniston is bomb diggety and it really pissed me off the way she got screwed by the two of you. Then I said to myself, "Self," I said, "Jenny - I call her Jenny in my head cuz we're that close! - was always too good for The Pitt. They did her a favor really. So yay, Brangelina!" Eventually I had to say to myself, "Self," I said, "Angie - I call you Angie in my head cuz if you can call a girl a slutbag you can certainly shorten her first name, right? - hasn't fallen back into cutting herself and wearing blood yet, maybe it's for reals?" And finally I said to myself, "Self," I said, "you're an idiot you. do. not. know. these. people. Get a life." That worked for a while but now all these rumors about you two breaking up are flying around like crazy and The Enquirer claims Jenny said she'd take The Pitt back and I'm all "Nooooooo!" And the truth is, it would be kind sad if it were true. I mean, obviously you have a bit of a Duggar syndrome so your litter of children would be pretty torn up but beyond that, I kinda think maybe, just maybe, you two are good together. So while I can't really take back the name calling because despite a growing acceptance of your relationship, you two did a bad thing and never even acted as if you did anything wrong. And from my spot on this high moral hill, you kinda suck for that.

Random Person You Don't Even Know Exists

It May Come To This

How many of you will quit commenting if I make you do word verification to leave me love and praise? I don't want to do it but these spam/Anonymous comments are killing me! I know, I'm being a bitch because they are always so well written *dripping sarcasm*. Someone should teach spammers how to put a damn sentence together. Maybe explain punctuation and a quick first grade spelling lesson would do them good. Now if I could just make the word verification say whatever I wanted it to like SpaMmer$ aRE gOinG to HeLl, sUck i+ b0ts or some variation.