December 13, 2009

My New Fave Trash TV

Have you seen this show, Million Dollar Listing on Bravo? If you haven't, you are missing some serious blog fodder! It centers around 3 real estate agents in the LA/Southern CA area and all their baggage and escapades. It's most definately trash TV, according to the Mr - although this opinion is always given while he sits next to me watching it, I might add - but it's pure bliss! My sister had several episodes DVR'd when we went to visit in November and I haven't been the same since.

There are three "pretty boys" - Chad, Josh, and Madison. According to his Twitter page and every quote he utters, Chad is the "star" but whatever. We'll deal with my Chad-rage in just a sec. They're all 3 melodramatic, extravagant, attention whores but I'm a blogger so except for the extravagant part, we're probably more alike than I'd like to think.

Obviously I wouldn't be blogging about them if I didn't have some opinions so I'll get down to the nitty gritty in personal letters to each of them. This is gonna be fun!


Dear Chad,

Please don't ever use the self-coined term, Chaderize, again. I might vomit. Also, if Josh doesn't throw that little rat you call a dog into a pool, I'd love to get a piece of that action. You're a douche bag simply because you post Twitter updates for that dog. And if that didn't make you a douche, your constant fiddling with and looking at your hair in the mirror makes you one. Oh, and then there's asking your girlfriend to sign a contract giving you 50% custody of the dog should you ever break up... oh ya know what, fuck it, everything you do makes you a douche. Picture my finger in the shape of an L on my forehead now.


Dear Josh,
Listen up Cutie-patootie, if you aren't the most adorable thing spending all that time with your Grandma and writing a book about her. I could just eat you up! My heart was yours when you asked The Tool Chad if his rat dog could swim but then you broke it when you didn't find out for sure. The Mr would like me to ask you if you have a razor. Mr Military takes issue with your scruff. I tried to take your side and point out that you have the short military hair but he says the scruff is too distracting for him to properly consider the appropriateness of the hair. I'm just the messenger.
Smooches!


Dear Madison,
You, my polyamorous friend, almost made me choke to death on a Cheeto carrot stick. The looks you give when your clients do and say dumb shit crack me up! And those teeth! They are some perfect, white teeth. Tell the truth, they're veneers, aren't they? I'm not hatin', I've got veneers myself, I'm just sayin'. Beyond that, I don't have much else. I'm way too busy hating on Chad and blubbering over Josh to form strong opinions about you. Maybe I'll either love or hate you next season. There IS going to be a next season, right? Make it happen!

12 comments:

Debra said...

OH dear, you really do like "trash" don't you? I just want you to know that there are a few of us who know that reality TV isn't "reality". Perhaps this is the reason people watch then, but I can think of a lot better fantasy shows to watch that don't involved douche bags and self important idiots.

Personally watching idiots half my age getting paid for being idiots is just to much for me. I do wonder though why all the "home" shows and shows about selling, fixing or buying property are all in CA? This, the state that is paying it's government bills with I.O.U.'s and has more city's and town's in bankruptcy than here in the Motor City?

Now that would be a show for me to watch, yeah move those nimrods here and let's see them work their magic, ha ha. I might watch that, of course it might only be one episode long.

The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

You are a braver woman that I, I run screamin' from the commercials.

I guess that kind of show separates the really strong people from the weak ones like me.

tracy

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

I love that show however I can't help but want to smack each one of them sometimes. They are all so self absorbed!!

The OmniCouple said...

Do you really like that show? I don't watch it. I work with a couple PR reps that send me Bravo exclusives. I usually only post the Real Housewives stuff, but they send me stuff from this show. If you ever want to post stuff for this show for them, email me. I will get you in contact with the reps. :)

Cassie said...

I love this show. I have to second your every emotion when it comes to Chad. When I found out that he paid $600 dollars a week on his hair, all I could think was "and it still looks like that!" As for the twitter updates, I'd love to know the losers who follow the dog, really are there not better things to read?

Diane said...

i watched it for like 5 minutes once and was so disgusted with chad that i couldn't bear it. lol

NoReturnMom said...

Yay! I've been looking for new guilty pleasure TV and this show sounds like it will fit the bill perfectly. Am gonna set my DVR now!

MoonNStarMommy said...

I've only caught one episode but I looooooooooved the guy who hangs out with his Grandma! He's awesome for sure.

Farmers Wife said...

Why oh why don't we get this show in Oz, I want to watch it.

~Ronda~ said...

Oh, I haven't watched it yet, but after reading that, I'm so gonna have too and soon!! Love the very detailed letters you write, too friggin cute!!

Stacie's Madness said...

i watch this too sometimes and that chad is fucking ridiculous.

love madison's teeth too, but he has a girlie name, don't know if I could get past that...well, I'd sleep with him, but it wouldn't go any further. now that I think about it, sure would be weird yelling out OH MADISON in bed.

Josh gets on my nerves but not nearly as bad as Chad.

How 'bout chad and his gf...seriously, I want to smack him and say, dude, she's NOT THAT INTO YOU...right? am i right?

Bill and Lorie Shewbridge said...

I have seen a couple of commercials for that show and they drove me insane. I cannot believe that he wastes all that time and money on his hair and he looks like a ridiculous spoiled girl.
I don't like ANY "reality" TV, and this one looks like one of the worst, but if you enjoy it, go for it!!