August 2, 2009

Things Must Change

I'm losing followers. I try desperately to try to find out who it was that abandoned me so I could ask them, Why? Was it the the Michael Jackson post? Cuz if that's it, you shouldn't be a reader of this blog.

I try to not to care about you. And by "you" I mean those who have been longtime readers who know this isn't a blog about my blissfully happy, prefect life and perfect kids. You knew that sunshine did not radiate from my ass. The point is you knew this and you read anyway and you laughed, too. So were you really that shocked to read me go after MJ? Really, cuz have you been paying attention at all?


I got pissed about the losing followers first and then I got pissed that I even want to look at my stats. I do, of course, and BAM! reason to be really pissed.

I hate this part of blogging and I've never even dove into the deep end in terms of networking. MomDot doesn't know I exist, I've had very few interactions with companies about ads and reviews and giveaways and sponsorship. I don't go to Blog-Her and I was envious about it this year until the blog posts about it started popping up. I'm pretty sure I'm out for 2010, too. I've never been invited to the other blogger conferences throughout the year. That's ok.

Right now I feel inspired by another blogger who I adore,
Sarah, who got fed up and stopped blogging. She's easing back in now but she came out swinging with her first few posts about how she's not playing the game anymore. She's writing what she wants to write, whenever she wants to write it. She's banning StatCounter because that's not why she writes. No pressure blogging. I'm on it.

Except I can't ban StatCounter cuz it provides me with some great blog fodder but no more new networking groups unless I feel like I LOVE the group. I don't give a damn about my Google Page Rank -
nor do I even know how to find out what it is. These google followers, I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't have that at all. That number just screams at me You are a fucking loser, your writing sucks, and as proof - someone dropped you because of it. I get enough of that shit from my own head, I don't need this supplemental ego dropkicking, thankyouverymuch.

Some people say
It's just a blog. Who cares what people you don't even know say? I say Oh shut the fuck up! It's not just a blog. It's where I rant. I swear on my laptop there are people alive today that may not have been if not for this outlet. And I'm not just talking about my children. It's true that I don't know most of my readers. But a lot of people from my real life read the blog. There are a few people I'm praying and wishing and hoping never read it but if they do it will not be the end of me.

But most importantly, I have made some fantastic friends through the blog. Yes, they are my friends. Some I have met in real life, some I haven't and some I will very soon. I can't freaking wait,
Krista and Sarah! I blow up my phone texting them all day long every day. We hack eachother's FarmTown accounts to save our crops - it's completely ridiculious but we're friends and that's what we do. We chat for hours online on Facebook. I know the names of their children and husbands, I know when they are freaking out because they're not packed for a move across the country. They know all that about me and can usually sense when I'm about to climb a clock tower with a rifle. The whole point of that was to say my blog is not JUST a blog. My blog is my outlet, my blog is to entertain, my blog is to document the crazy shit these kids have put me through. Somehow along the way I met these gals who are my friends. And that's a hell of a plus.

I said all that to say from now on I'm writing for those gals who fight to the death for the Comment Whore Crown. I write for loyal readers, commenters - only the nice ones, the trolls can scurry back under their bridge and suck it. I write for the small group of people who read and love my blog. I try my very best to send a quick email after I get a comment but if there's no email I always go leave them a comment. I can do that because I have such a small following and that's ok with me. I was never meant to be a big shot anyway.

42 comments:

Elle said...

It's your blog, write what you want and too bad if someone doesn't agree with one of your posts. We've also met a lot of great friends through blogging and then again, some not so nice. I really enjoy blogging more than I ever thought I would. Sorry to ramble on, but you've got a funny blog and if people are too serious to laugh at life that's too bad for them.

CaseyDeuce said...

Seriously... I love your site. There was a friend of mine who actually said to me "I found this girl through you, she's friggen' hilarious, I love the all out swearing." You have fans. You DONT want my take on the Dot though.

The comment whore crown though.. that bitch is mine... I don't want to share and all the other girls can back the truck up, cause its mine, all mine... I like to be a pretty pretty princess in my comment whore crown....

Sarah said...

Power to the antiestablishment bloggers who refuse to whore to stats and follower counts!

And way to go for those of us who try and still end up looking at all the trackers in pursuit of the abolutely hysterical search that will be blog fodder gold!!

As for the Whore crown - it's all mine baby.

taysmommy said...

Screw whoever quit following. I became a follower after reading one post a long ways back. I loved your style and how real you are with your posts and here I am...still. Beleive me they're are plenty of us who are HUGE fans of you and your writing.

AngieB said...

Don't change a thing about what you're doing! I only recently found your blog and began following, but there are some days I NEED the laugh I get from your latest post, and I NEED to know there's someone out there who realizes MJ was a perv and their neighbors are jackasses!

Night Owl Mama said...

I love reading your blog I think that the people who were following you and stopped could of stopped for different reasons or the same like you said. BUT if that was the case they weren't genuinely following you and you don't need followers like that any how.
There are a ton more genuine followers out there to be had who want to read your awesomely funny content they just don't know it yet :)

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure the Michael Jackson post was the first one I read, and from that post i decided to follow you. I'm grateful that BPOTW featured you and I found you, because, for what it's worth, I think you're great. Great: Funny and real and entertaining.

The Wrenns said...

Hell, I didn't even know this whole bloggy "underworld" existed with a "popluar crowd" and "prizes". I thought it was just a place to share family pics, jokes, thoughts, and life's adventures. I didn't know or care about comments or followers (though now I am secretly envious of everyone else's numbers). But the bottom line is that I do whatever the heck I want and if people happen to stumble across my blog, that's great. I try not to worry about people following & reading my crap. I do, however, care about the blogs I follow and though I've only recently found you, I LOVE your brutal honesty and the way you humorously write about your family life. SO, don't stop just because a few knuckleheads dropped off your list!! I think your stuff is GREAT (and so does my husband, but he'll never admit to secretly reading my blogroll!)

Anonymous said...

Write what you know about stuff you want to write about. It's a funny blog & you got some great dark humor on it.

I've stopped following some blogs in the past. The reasons were 1.Their blogs had become a daily drone about how wonderful they were & how they were the center of the universe & simply want more sunshine blown up their asses. That gets old quick. 2.The second reason was the blogs that had become Groundhog Day blogs. Every posting looked just like the last. yawn.

When I first started reading blogs, I gravitated towards blogs that "everybody' seemed to be following until I started finding more "indie" blogs with better content, humor & seemed like folks I'd be friends with.

I try not to follow the cattle so to speak & weeded down my blog roll list to blogs I simply liked or had something in common with the blogger.

I write my blog more for me & if others read it - woohoo. Icing on the cake!!

So maybe the folks who stopped following you were looking for blogs that all the other cattle follow. Don't waste your worry on readers who stopped following you & enjoy the readers that stick with you!

You're wry sense of humor is priceless - can't teach that stuff. You either have it or you don't! Folks either get it or they don't.

Anonymous said...

All I have to say is that I absolutely adore your blog,write what you want to write,do what you want to do and forget about trying to make everyone else happy because as long as your happy that's what matters most.

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

You've gotta write what's true for you and not what you "think" people want to read.

And for the record, I enjoy your posts.

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

You've gotta write what's true for you and not what you "think" people want to read.

And for the record, I enjoy your posts.

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

You've gotta write what's true for you and not what you "think" people want to read.

And for the record, I enjoy your posts.

Nocturnal Queen said...

I only have 18 followers, but I enjoy blogging. It'd be great if I got more comments than I do. It won't stop me from blogging though. I need the outlet. I know you understand that.

I read every new entry you write. I'm one of your followers and I have you listed in my blogroll. :-)

Brenda Susan said...

I love you & your blog. Well I know your blog better than I know you so lets say I love your blog & I like you. That works! :)

Sara Bonds said...

Don't care about those things. Seriously. They don't matter. You can network, go to BlogHer, be active in communities, go to conferences, etc. Those things often do not mean real friends. It's all business most of the time. PR this, network that. I have stepped away from most forum, communities, and social networks recently to get back to the basics and focus on my life and my blog. I may not have a ton of followers, I may lose some along the way, I may never get to BlogHer, but I know that the women who read my blog care. That matters to me. I have made awesome friends, and they are all readers of my blog, not women from networking.

Deb said...

Fuck 'em, Sissy! I love your blog for all the reasons you just listed in this post. Keep being yourself--your loyal friends and followers aren't going anywhere.

Farmers Wife said...

Pls stay put, don't go anywhere.. Its their loss, they are missing out on a good read/laugh/rant, if there was two of me we both would follow you..

And I really need the comment whore crown, as I have only had it once...

*Noelle* said...

you tell it girl!! FREEDOM of speech, helllllllllllllooooo... if they don't like it, they can suck it, right??? lol

Ordie O. said...

You'll always be a big shot to me.

Shelli (wishes she was) Mrs. Burchett;) said...

I found you @ Life in Left Field...I can't wait to read more from you!

Debra said...

Like I told you before I am all about the "Crown" Baby! I removed the follower gadget from my blog because frankly for me it's a scam. Many add people get added when there are giveaways. I will often follow, if I must, to participate. Still do you really want people who are only there for a chance to win something? No. I stopped the nonsense long ago. I had my first real "mean" spirited comment (don't you write anything happy? WTF I may write when I am upset or how I feel and I am not even close to some of the more caustic remarks on your posts) a few months ago from "anonymous". I just deleted it. Frankly how serious can I take some coward who hides behind Anonymous? So all bets are off no stat counter, no followers. I only "really" follow a handful of blogs. Some simply because they "require" that I follow for an event, and they get me only until the event passes most times, then off they come. Lets be honest I don't even look at that silly follower scroll on my dashboard with the latest post on these blogs. I have a blog "links" tab,(My Links Button on left), If I "really" like a blog I put it there, with the latest dated posting. That's where I look, and that is for me, at least, the place that counts! If your blog is listed there, I "am" following you (because I care enough to remember where you are and how to find you). Hey, and I have been know to "clean" house there too. Stop worrying Sissy, Those that love ya, love ya, you don't need the rest! (and anyway you have a-freakin-lot of followers compared to me and a lot of others).

Izzy 'N Emmy said...

I like that I have people who come over and read my life every once in awhile, but I am really low key as well. I do a review once in awhile but no one knows me from the next blogger and that's okay with me.

I write for me and my kids. I want my kids to be able to see what was happening in this time of their life. I write for my family so that they may be "near" the girls even though they live so far away.

I take photos because that's what I love and sharing them with other's is just a perk.

Write what you want and enjoy being a mommy blogger. *hug* I enjoy your blog, just the way it is. You are a big shot blogger to me. :)

otter said...

I was just on vacation for a week, I didn't dump you I swear.

otter said...

I was just on vacation for a week, I didn't dump you I swear.

Totally_Toni said...

Who gives a doodie (like the 2 year old talk LOL) about what the heck people think. I have followers leave me daily and you know what they get... a big farewell wave and hope the door knocks the shit out of you on the way out giggle.

Seriously I love your blog, even though i suck at commenting lOL. So rest assured, this crazy chick is sticking around and that's what really matters...you know it is :)

robin said...

Look at you with 25 comments!!! :)
I know how you feel... I don't do a mommy blog either so I am very low on the popularity contest list. I've been struggling with readers and comments and all that shit from day one.
If it makes you feel better, my stats have been HORRIBLY down all the summer, with fewer people reading and even fewer people leaving me comments. People clearly have better things to do with their time right now than reading about what music I happen to like a the moment.
It annoys the shit out of me, but like you said, I am really not doing this for other people. The feedback helps but I shouldn't allow it to define me. But really, I am only human. At least most of the time!
Enjoy your vacation and you'll feel better when you come back all renewed!
:) Robin

LadyBug-Kellie said...

Just wanted to leave a quick comment - it's a little late but still counts right? :) I always enjoy reading your posts...they crack me up! You usually say exactly what I am thinking but am too afraid to say on my own blog. You're awesome, don't stop!!

Diane said...

uumm... i heart you. if that counts for anything.

different ppl blog for different reasons. whatever your reason, you should stay true to it.

your blog is one of my faves.

Bill and Lorie Shewbridge said...

You are my lifeline to sanity!!! I laught EVERY day because of you. I told you when you lost 4 people after that perv MJ thing that if I could follow you 4 more times I would, and I mean it. I don't even know how to look up the stats, and I don't care... I just like to read and write about stuff I see, do and feel. And right now I'm feeling the CROWN!!! Get otta my way Debra (just kidding) :-)

~aj~ said...

I gotta tell you it is very freeing to not care about any of that garbage. Sure I enjoy comments as much as the next person, but I have no idea how many people follow my blog or visit my site any given day. I'm very happy to do without all the networking and games that go along with the blog popularity contests.

You have so many loyal readers because you're a witty and funny writer. And your sarcastic attitude doesn't hurt things either. :)

Blog about what makes YOU feel good and I guarantee you'll continue to have a strong following.

Andrea said...

I'm glad you're not quitting. I've recently had a decrease in hits as well. . .maybe this is a bad month for bloggers! Whenever I start to take it personally, I just remember the reason why I started blogging - which is for me and my son. I am contemplating a break, though because I want it to remain fun - not something that uses up my time and energy.

Sula Lee said...

Don't give up and don't worry about what anyone else does or says. The blog is for you and if you remember that, you will be happy no matter what!

Rhea@mommy23monkeysh said...

FWIW - your blog is one of my favorites in my giant google reader. I feel obligated to subscribe to a lot of sites, but I actually look forward to reading what you have to say. You are funny as shit and I wish I could be you.

Allie said...

I lost my first follower by taking the Lord's name in vain, I think. I kind of see it as a follower natural selection: once all the easily offended ones are gone, only awesome ones remain.

bapsmom said...

Okay so I know that I haven't been reading your blog lately but if you quit then I'm commiting suicide just a threat to make sure you don't my life depends on it. Then you can tell those sorry ass people that make you want to run for the hills screaming to kiss your lily white ass because I've got readers that like me for me and what I write not the made up fantasy world most of society lives in today.
P.S. You are more than welcome to break into my facebook account anytime. I will let you in my lil piece of the world whenever you want a break from yours!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm still here and ready to be the Comment Whore once again!!!! I just had to get settled into my new place and trust me, I had semi withdrawals - okay, real ones - missing your blog! Fuck those people who left. If they were offended they need to go back into that plastic bubble they live in. Life is offensive people! Idiots!
I love your blog and I really do miss it when I can't get to it! Your loyals peeps are still with ya' and unless you give me the boot I'm going nowhere!

Unknown Mami said...

I think you are hot shit on a silver platter.

I'm as insecure as the person, but in the end you have to be true to yourself.

I tell myself that I am a delicious piece of chocolate cake unfortunately sometimes people are in the mood for lemon meringue; it does not negate the fact that I am a kick ass piece of chocolate cake.

I have a hard time believing the MJ post was all that offensive. I felt sad that MJ died, but I'm not blind to his faults and your post did not offend me. People don't turn into saints because they die.

Whatever, keep on blogging 'cause you want to and enjoy the ones that love ya. Screw the rest.

The girl with the flour in her hair said...

Ok, you had me at the comment about the sunshine not coming out of your ass...you have a new follower. You make me laugh, and as a stay at home mom with insanity issues, I need all the laughter I can get.

Don't feel like a loser...that crown is mine. I've only had about 7 hits on my blog. Do you feel bad for me yet?


www.peelinganorangewithascrewdriver.blogspot.com

If you get a chance, look at it and make it 8! :)

The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

Someone just sent me your link and I'm following you. And now I'm off to read more of your blog cause I loved this post... and I know what you mean about statcounter fodder... How can you dump something that lets you know people are finding your blog by searcing 'diseased womans feet pictures'

I mean, the fuck? right?

Who could give up knowing that?

Tracy

MoonNStarMommy said...

Hey!! I am usually one of those people who fight for the comment whore crown!! I loooooooooove being a comment whore!! LOL... I like it even better when I get comments, but leaving is fun too! LOL... I'm sorry I didn't abandon you I promise (incase you were wondering about me, but I'm not thinking you were - LOL) ... I have just had a lot going on and I sorta just fell off the blog world for awhile... but I missed everyone, especially you and a few others which is why I keep coming back and catching up - speaking of which, I caught up with your JN sega - oye-vey! Still issues going on??? Or have things finally calmed down?

Shannon said...

I think you blog because you want to, not because you are winning a popularity contest. Or at least you have to think about that when you start at some point. If you enjoy blogging, KEEP GOING. Also remember, this is a really busy time of year for a lot of people-I bet that many blogs see a drop in traffic when school starts. But at the end of the day, it's your life and if you want to share it, I say go for it.