June 12, 2009

Not Blog Fart Friday

I've done a few Blog Fart Fridays lately and it's starting to bug me so I'm out of that game. I'm essentially gonna do the same thing I just refuse to call it Blog Fart Friday. I'm a rebel like that, see my Wordless Wednesdays.

Do you ever wonder if a celeb you blogged about ever read your blog? Like when I call a certain homewrecker a Slutbag and profess my slightly twisted admiration for another. I've heard that sometimes they read blogs about themselves so it's possible, right? If you knew the famous one would grace your blog with his or her presence, would you edit?

I try really hard to respond to all of my comments because I need love them. But I need your email address to stalk you properly, okay? Cooperate please!

Oh, if I don't have you on my blogroll just send me a quick note sayin' What's up with that, heifer, put my damn button up! Do not piss and moan to everyone else about it, send me a bitchy email about disrespect, remove me from your blogroll, and then systematically delete every comment you ever left for me. Didn't you grow out of that shit in 3rd grade? Fucking infant!

I love Twitter, I hate Twitter, I love Twitter...

Did anyone notice my first paid ad floating up there in the scroll box (top right)? Go ahead, click on it, I get nothing if you do but it'd be nice if they actually got something for their money.

I chatted with a neighbor this week who is totally gonna join the Oust The Jackass Neighbor Campaign. I think we're soulmates because she thinks the Lawn Pride epidemic here is out of control and she actually uttered the words "piss on them" when I relayed the ongoing saga to her.

After many years we are saying goodbye (and good riddance) to AT&T. We will now be slaves to Verizon. I'm not sure which I despise more right now - AT&T for not providing service here or Verizon for picking my husband's wallet clean. That's my job, dammit!

Our house in Arkansas has been on the market for 409 days. We've set closing dates 3 times and obviously never actually closed on the damn thing. That idiot-box we call a mortgage company has no help except to say "you have to be delinquent to enroll in any programs". CitiBank will be my mortal enemy until the day I die and if I wasn't such a chicken shit responsible person I'd burn that damn house down and mail those son of a bitches a box of the ashes. Oh, unless we are delinquent you have no programs available? Here's my program, let's see how much you can get for this!

I have several awards to formally accept but it's past midnight and those 2 mini-psychos I call my children will no doubt be up at 6am since we don't have anything to actually wake up early for. Besides, I'm low on blog material (and funny in case you haven't noticed) so I'll drag that out into it's own post so I don't have to think too hard.
Post a Comment