I wanted to stop by Wal-Mart before we dropped Skylee off so I braved the pre-storm psychos. A half hour later I finally pulled into a parking spot and prepared to wrestle 3 kids in the hell that is Wal-Mart. I turned around to see all three of them sleeping. Dammit! So we left. I might be crazy enough to attempt to take 3 kids into a store alone but you can bet your sweet ass I'm not gonna wake sleeping children and then try it. I choose life, thank you very much.
January 31, 2009
The Calm Before The Storm
I wanted to stop by Wal-Mart before we dropped Skylee off so I braved the pre-storm psychos. A half hour later I finally pulled into a parking spot and prepared to wrestle 3 kids in the hell that is Wal-Mart. I turned around to see all three of them sleeping. Dammit! So we left. I might be crazy enough to attempt to take 3 kids into a store alone but you can bet your sweet ass I'm not gonna wake sleeping children and then try it. I choose life, thank you very much.
January 29, 2009
I Better Not Catch Mother Nature In A Dark Alley
January 27, 2009
I Never Would Have Guessed
January 26, 2009
In The Red
January 25, 2009
Mama Needs Answers
January 24, 2009
Tool
January 23, 2009
In Progress
January 22, 2009
The Case of Good Mom vs Bad Mom
January 21, 2009
The Big Post About Nothing
January 20, 2009
Gone For 5 Days
January 18, 2009
You Are What You Search For
If you have landed here by a search of these terms
If you are here because you are searching these terms
hogtied homemade
hogtied kids
creative blog for kids
learn all about martians for kids
what do about stuffed up nose at night only kids
creative stuff for kids to do
then you are in the wrong place. You are looking for the blog by Mrs Perfect about her 2 Perfect Kids and all of the intellectual stimulating activities they do each day. I am not Mrs Perfect, I'm more a Mrs Barely Surviving and this blog is all about my 2 Absolutely Unperfect Kids and all the ways I make it through the day without hurting anyone. Much.
January 17, 2009
I Did Not
January 15, 2009
WTF, Asshole!?!?
January 13, 2009
GNO - kiddie style
January 12, 2009
I Can't Stop Crying
January 10, 2009
A Timeline of Bullsh*t
Boys Are Gross
Seriously, why?
January 9, 2009
Lost In Texas?

January 7, 2009
The Weirdness Continues
will blemish cream help with a hickey? - help it with what?
Mama sucks me off while I sleep - well, isn't that nice for you?
can u suck me off - I could but I'll pass, thanks.
how to cover a hickey, boy - lots of people are having hickey issues aren't they?
snuggie battery powered - why would that dumbass thing need batteries?
giving hickey and got boner - I hate to hear that. really, I hate to hear that, you adolescent idiot.
rejuvenique danger - I think you might be the danger, my dear.
hide a hickey - yes, please hide the nasty thing!
January 6, 2009
I Have No Authority Over My Children

January 5, 2009
Broken Resolutions
Signs of Gluttony
January 4, 2009
How Kids Deal
Chick Stuff
Bastard had no fear.
He even played peek a boo with us.
I'm really not kidding, the bastard had zero fear.
If he had opposable thumbs there would have been a note next to the mousetrap with the peanut butter licked clean off of it that said, "Thanks for dinner, bitch."
So we bought some different traps and not 30 minutes after we set them, we heard the snap.
We had a mouse. And then I start feeling bad for breaking the little prick's neck. I actually felt bad. What IS that?
January 1, 2009
Tools Not Toys
"Aidan, you can't play with Daddy's toys, I mean tools, out here!"
"Mama, you said 'toys' and they're 'tools'. Daddy tells me every single day that they're not toys."
