He asked me if I used the steam.Yes, I pushed the button.He asked if steam came out.I guess.He asked me when was the last time I put water in the iron.What? Why would I put water in the iron?He asked me how I thought it makes steam?The button on the iron, duh!
November 26, 2008
November 25, 2008
I think it would be best if he acted human.
November 24, 2008
Dear Popular Bloggy Girls,
Be kind. I'm just a dork.
The New Girl In Class
The pathetic number of followers of this blog - 15
The even more pathetic number of followers of my other blog - 13
The number of Twitter followers - 33
The number of MySpace friends - 75
The ungodly large number that taunts me from the bathroom scale - yeah, right, I'm gonna put that out on the internet!
The ever dwindling number representing the balance in my savings account - if the number is a negative, it's still a number, right?
The infuriating number of days our house has been for sale - 211
The amount below purchase price the house is listed today - $10,000
The number of people who have come to see the house - 9
The amount of money my blogs are making - roughly 17 cents per day
The number of days until my husband moves to Nebraska without us - 35
The number of children in peril when I temporarily become a single parent - 2
The number of years too young Edward is for me - at least 10
The number on my next birthday cake - 30
November 23, 2008
hopping around pee dance - did you want an instructional video or just a written tutorial?boiling point for kids - it's probably 100 degrees just like any other food. baking usually keeps the flavor betterhippie blog templates - I didn't think hippies were supposed to care about appearancesn*ked kids swimming, small kids n*ked, n*ked kid pictures & kids swimming n*ked - damn, those perverts don't give up easily! I bet you were totally disappointed to see the black bars, hu, jackass? Do I need to refer you to my warning?sucking daddies - *shaking head*what the hell was he thinking? - I wish I knew, I really dopuzzle tattoo man - do not do it! there are better ways to come up with blog material, pierce something.
My husband is thoroughly enjoying the opportunity to tease me about reading a "teenageer" book. I'm gonna let him have his fun for about another 6 minutes and then I'm gonna get to work on collecting his life insurance.
The local news story on opening night explaining to parents what their kids are so excited about got him started and he hasn't stopped. Sometimes you just gotta put a rabid dog down. Seeing a movie based on a beloved book is essentially begging for disappointment. I know this. But I loved the movie. Loved it. Mostly...
Robert Pattinson still isn't "my" Edward but he'll do in a pinch. I mean, my eyes weren't bleeding from looking at him for 2 hours or anything. I'd
Rosalie, Rosalie, Rosalie... Could they not write anything for you other than Rosalie scowls at Bella, Rosalie glaring in background, and Rosalie smashes glass bowl and says "That's just great!"? I needed you to be the bitch you were written to be, not just a mean-face maker. Although you really are good at that.
So there it is. My ooohhh's and aaahhh's of the movie.
November 21, 2008
November 20, 2008
November 18, 2008
Yup. Never in his life has he ever made reference to my boobs until we're at the church preschool and there's a video camera rolling. Then he starts batting at them like a damn cat with a string! And when I try to hold his hands because just telling him to stop doesn't work - shocker! - he yells, "I can touch them!".
November 16, 2008
November 15, 2008
November 14, 2008
November 13, 2008
November 12, 2008
November 10, 2008
November 9, 2008
November 8, 2008
November 6, 2008
1Put ice on it right away. The hickey will diminish in appearance if you use ice on it soon after your make out session.
2Use green concealer. This type of makeup can be bought at any drugstore and will
completely hide the hickey or at least make it less noticeable. Neutrogena manufactures a green cream concealer that can work wonders.
3Apply a thick layer of foundation. Blend the foundation into your entire neck area and top with some powder. Use a shade that is slightly darker than your complexion. Use a lower cost brand like Maybelline or Cover Girl since you may need to use a lot.
4Keep your hair down. If you have long hair you can hide the hickey by keeping your hair parted to the side that the hickey is on.
5Wear a scarf or turtleneck. If you happen to get the hickey in colder months, you are in luck since you will be able to use clothing to cover it up.
Trust me, Hickey Girl, getting a hickey doesn't show the world that some Prince Charming loves you, it says "some boy with a boner took me for a slut and all I got was this lousy hickey".
November 5, 2008
November 4, 2008
Okay back to it... someone tagged me, and I suck and can't remember who. If it was you, please feel free to call me a horses ass. That issue aside, I'm in. And I'm passing the buck to these funny gals.
November 2, 2008
1. I hate warm chocolate chip cookies. My husband bakes them fresh and as he eats his hot out of the oven, mine are in the freezer. It breaks his heart a little everytime I make him do it.2. I still haven't picked up that dead bug in Aidan's closet.3. I have no intention of going back to work. While I thoroughly enjoyed having a job where I could utilize my love for profanity against people who definately deserved it (as proof by their prison record), I'm lazy. I don't want to have to do anything everyday.4. I don't like people. Seriously, it's a damn wonder I have any friends. People irritate me and I have a hard time sensoring myself. How anyone puts up with my never-ending rash of shit is beyond me. I consider it a miracle of God that someone married me.5. I think my fingers are fat. And I obsess about it. I am totally serious when I say I would get liposuction on my fingers before my ass.6. Daylight Savings Time blows my mind. I'm screwed up for weeks and I can't get it straight in my head. If I think about it too hard... See, I can't even explain it.7. Sometimes when Asher cries in the night I get him up just to watch him walk around the house all delusional. It's hysterical! As if he had any coordination fully awake, watching him bumble around half-asleep is fantastic! I stop just short of waking him up on purpose for entertainment value when I'm bored.
November 1, 2008
He wouldn't say Trick or Treat or even go up to the door. Daddy had to do it while Aidan stood back.
Asher wasn't in love either. So we just went back home and waited for our friends to come back to start the party. Aidan had way more fun giving out candy at home than trotting around the streets begging for it.
Once our friends got back we stuffed ourselves with pizza and cookies and the kids played Play Doh and Pin the Nose on the Pumpkin. The night ended with Aidan and Skylee crying because they couldn't spend the night together. That's us, ending on a high note.