My toothbrush has been located! Found it in a pocket of our luggage. Complete with dog hair and red Very Cherry Jelly Belly spit. Thanks, Ash!
1. I think flies are the most disgusting creatures in existence. I feel an inappropriate amount of rage toward them and and inappropriate amount of joy when I kill one.2. I had my tongue pierced twice in college. As in two different times, not two different holes.3. There is a dead bug in Aidan's closet that's been there for months and I'm just too lazy to go get a napkin to pick it up.4. I've had 8 different vehicles since I was 16.5. I think Angelina Jolie is a homewrecking slutbag and Brad Pitt is a tool.6. I gained 53 pounds when I was pregnant with Aidan and only 11 pounds with Asher.7. Most meat grosses me out. I'm borderline vegetarian much to the disgust of my meat eater husband.
"I didn't know policemen weared Grandma Fleisher's hankies on their heads."
"Mama, does Deedle let his little boy wear his hankie?""Do you mean Eudell? Which little boy?
"The one at the bumpooter that played with Asher." *meaning the grown-ass man officer!*
Ring! Ring!Mr: Engineering, this is SB.Me: Hey honey, I'm just trying out the new headset. Can you hear me?Mr: Hello?Me: Honey! Can you hear me?Mr: Hello!?!? Ugh! (hangs up)
Ring! Ring!Mr: Engineering, this is SB.Me: Honey, it's me, can you hear me?Mr: (growling) Hello?Me: Honey! It's me!Mr: Goddamn it! (hangs up)
Ring! Ring!Mr: (grumbling into the phone) Hello?Me: Honey, It's me, can...I can't stop laughing long enough to even type this!Mr: (in a voice low enough not to be heard by everyone in his office) oh, you cock-sucking mother fucker! (slams phone down on desk a few times and then hangs up)