July 31, 2008

Missing My Sweet Tea

Wanna know what blows? Drinking water in lieu of my beloved sweet tea. That's what blows.

I ran out two days ago and I was kinda ragin' over it but was holding out. In the meantime I drank water, usually with lemon or something to mask the untaste of water. That sucky untasteyness (see, it's MY blog so I can just make shit up).

And unfortunately I was giving thought to the decrease in the size of my ass that could result from cutting the obscene amount of calories the sweet tea has. I mean, I'm gaining weight like it's my fucking job lately.

I blame the sweet tea. So today instead of 2 gallons of sweet tea I bought 1 gallon of sweet tea and a 6 pack of Smart Water.

Shut up, it's progress. Rome wasn't built in a day! And yes I know buying plastic bottles of water will fill up the landfills and ruin Earth - I plan on refilling and I recycle so get off my ass, okay?

Alright, back to choosing Smart Water over Fiji or Sam's Choice. Am I really about to admit this? I chose it because I saw Jennifer Aniston drinking it. Well, I didn't see her drinking it, I saw a picture of her drinking it. And I'm on Team Aniston, not Team Slutbag Jolie. What do you think, will I look like her in a couple months?

I realize that the last post as well as this one are quite pro-one product or another. I have not been paid by Smart Water or Apple to advertise or talk up these products. If I had been I'd totally take the money like a good little product placement whore.
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